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Good afternoon everyone, my name is David - (here are some pictures of me) and I'm a 27-year-old computer science graduate from New Jersey. I'm here on reddit in the hopes of finding a like-minded woman who is interested in a great long-term relationship.
In my free time, I enjoy exploring the great outdoors through camping, going to Renaissance fairs and museums, skateboarding, taking walks on the beach, and trying new restaurants. I'm a big fan of gaming, both on my PC and Switch, and listening to Extreme Metal music, especially Black Metal, Death Metal, Brutal Death Metal, and Slam. I'm also slowly learning Japanese, not just for anime, but also for music and to have fun playing games in the original language (I've been going kinda slow but I have a long duolingo streak). Some of my favorite bands include: Cradle of Filth, Belphegor, Gorgoroth, Mayhem, Emperor, Imperial Circus Dead Decadence, Unlucky Morpheus, King Diamond, The Black Dahlia Murder, Twiztid, and Burzum.
In my search for a partner, I'm looking for someone who has a great sense of humor, strong family values, and a positive outlook on life. I prefer women between the ages of 18-24 who are East-Asian, South-East-Asian, or Caucasian, and who are slim, fit, or petite. While education and job aren't crucial to me, I'm not interested in someone who has had a lot of sexual partners. My main priority is finding someone who is interested in a serious relationship and starting a family someday.
If this sounds like you, I'd love to get to know you better. Don't hesitate to send me a message and let's see where things go! I'd love to get a photo as well.

I (32M) have been with my wife (32F) for 12 years, married for 7. Usual story of sex being great at the start and then tailing off. She’s the only person I’ve been with, and I was quite a quiet person when we met. More recently I’ve come out of my shell and have been reflecting on life. We have no kids. We’ve had sex maybe 2-3 times this year and I’m constantly craving affection. I honestly can’t remember the last time we made out, probably when we had sex. But this isn’t the worst part for me. The worst part is that my wife does not want to talk about it. I’ve tried to talk with her, but often this is in moments of frustration, and somethings things comes out wrong, and very often she’s defensive and feels like I’m pressuring her. I’ve not got much out of her to be honest, but I think she also believes that it’s a problem. She’s told me it’s not me, it’s her, and the best thing for me to do is put no pressure on her, as in no initiating, she will. I know she’s not happy with the way she looks at the moment and struggles to feel sexy, I of course tell her she is, but appreciate that only goes so far. This is sending me mad though, because nothing seems to change, so I can’t tell whether she is working through things or just burying her head in the sand and hoping it goes away or changes by magic. As you can tell, I’m quite frustrated and am venting at this point. The result is that I have nobody to talk to about this, and it’s got to the stage where she’ll completely ignore anything related that I say. For example I sent her an article about making out each night before bed, regardless of having sex to try and reduce the pressure, completely blanked. I brought it up and tried to make out, completely blank. Now here’s the worst bit that I’m not proud of. I know she both reads mildly erotic books and gets herself off with her toy when I’m not home overnight. I rationally tell myself that doesn’t matter, and that she’s free to enjoy herself and maybe it will help her work through things, but I can’t stop the negative bit of my brain thinking she’s escaping the real world into a fantasy world that I’m not in. Writing this down just made it hit and now I’m sobbing, great. I've also tried sharing the porn and watch and thing I'm into with her from time to time and there's no interest, and knowing her I'm not sure it would be the best idea anyway. I’ve also tried suggesting therapy. She’s from a pretty conservative background and is very much a “nobody needs to know my problems” person. She also said “is it that bad?” which is a question with no right answer. I feel like if I ranted to her about this it would be taken as pressure, and the last thing I want her to do is something that she’s not comfortable with. I love her so much.

For more context: https://www.reddit.com/Save3rdPartyApps/comments/13yh0jf/dont\_let\_reddit\_kill\_3rd\_party\_apps/ Tiny resume: Reedit is changing its API price (up to 20 million $ per year) to the third party apps that offers accessibility to ddisabled people, no ads, no porn, and also it offers better tools for subreddit moderation, things that the official reddit app doesn't. Basically the blackout consist in going "dark" 2 days, from 12th to 14th. (or indefentely, some communities like ProgrammerHumor prefers to go dark indefentely) I hope this doesn't break any rule, if so mods please feel free to delete my post but at lease consider what people is gonna vote.

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It seems the more and more I learn about Nofap the more susceptible I am to failure. I know more than what I need to quit, but for instance this Sunday, I failed three times in one day for the first time in years. Then yesterday I had learned enough that I had been able to tackle my heightened porn craving because of Sunday that I was able to resist until then, saying no 4 times even though I had already gotten started (I’ll take that as a win) before eventually failing on the 5th time. But because I had essentially been edging 4 times in a row before realizing what I was doing, when I eventually did orgasm… I didn’t actually feel anything at all. Like seriously nothing, at all whatsoever. My meat just felt abused. I’ve had ache-y feeling in my abdomen ever since. After that I just kept asking myself why I did any of that. And I was a little scared too cause some of the videos I saw I remember being actually abusive. I just generally feel sick with myself. I feel like I have the power going forward to beat it though. I’m motivated by what I’ve learned that has for the first time in my condition allowed me to say no when the urges get strong enough that I actually give in and begin. I said no 4 times in a row. For me that’s groundbreaking stuff. And I’m also motivated by the fact that the entire thing was and felt awful. Like truly awful. I was upstairs instead of hanging out and watching a movie, I was sweaty, uncomfortable, and generally self aware for at least 30% of the time, and I saw stuff that was disturbing. That self awareness has allowed me to see that it has always been like this, and if that’s how it is I don’t think I can physically continue too much longer with this. It’s sickening.
For today though, it’s day one. I’ve got the power to say no, and genuinely don’t want to do this anymore, it’s repulsive and disgusting. It may not be this attempt, but I don’t see this porn habit lasting until after the monsoon season where I live.
Cya later, if you have any tips or feedback please comment them, and feel free to call me pathetic and disgusting, that’s what I need right now.